Work Begins

So, today is my last day of freedom. I begin my new job tomorrow and am torn as to whether or not I am looking forward to it. I am flying to South Carolina in the morning and will begin training as a project manager for a fuel delivery software company. I'm really nervous about it because everyone there seems super smart and on top of their game. I know they would not have offered me the job if they hadn't felt the same way about me! It's just, project management is a highly involved and very difficult job to do. You have to keep everyone on track and be on top of EVERYTHING and step on toes to get your job done. I worry that I am going to go into this without any friends because I am going to be on everyone's case until they get their jobs done!!

Look, I know I can do the job, it's just weird for me to be doing it for another company. I was with my former company for 16 years and it is all that I have ever known. I worry that everyone will be smarter and faster than me. I was one of the golden children at my former company and everyone came to ME for help and for information. I was valued...and I worry that I may not be as valuable here and that worries me. Failure worries me. I need to find my confidence!

Move Complete

Ahhhh, the move to Indianapolis is now complete. It's been a long rough week so far...mainly due to all of the unpacking and cleaning. We have so much work to do but a limited amount of time to do it before Rob goes back to work. We do not want to spend all of our time working on the house while he is on vacation so we are trying to make a little fun time. We managed to make it to the movies earlier in the week and we visited my holy place a few times...yes, I am talking about the Wally World!

I've actually been feeling a little under the weather this week. I'm not sure if it is nerves and stress or if something is going on with me but, only time will tell! It's probably some type of chemical from all of the cleaners I have been using this week. The old bachelor pad is starting to turn into a home now! No more pool table in the middle of the living room and the road gear cases have finally gone back to their rightful owners!! Trust me folks, those two items have been a major battle for the ol' Shannie Bug to win!

New Beginnings

So I'm sitting here on the floor in my empty dining room waiting for my Fiance to arrive. I'm moving to Indianapolis tomorrow to be with him and my life is going to change forever.

I have lived in my apartment for 10 years. I've also lived alone for those 10 years with the exception of one roommate that only lasted for 3 months. I've always been so independent and have never relied upon anyone for anything. The times that I have tried to, I have been let down in the end. I'm getting ready to give up that independence to be with Rob and I'm a little nervous about it. It's not that I think that he will try to change me in any way shape or form, it's just that I have been doing things my way since I was 18 years old and now I have to consider someone else. Sure, I've been in relationships before where I tried to be considerate, but this is on a totally different level. I've always been the one in control...a natural born leader...and I worry that my take charge attitude may rub off on him the wrong way. He's been on his own for a long while also and has his own independence. He has the same fears that I do. But, ultimately, we know that a life without one another would be totally unacceptable! I'm ready to take this plunge and dive in head first and worry about the confrontations later. We have agreed to be patient with one another and to love one another no matter what challenges we face over the next couple of months while we get acclimated to one another. It's gonna be a wild ride!!